I’ll never forget driving along the PCH in the middle of nowhere, dotted on the map in Southern California. Windows rolled down in my vehicle, sun fading into the mountains, yet another day saying goodbye to all of the beauties and pains that filled the hours since night.
I pulled into an old, weathered Mission (photo) wrought with history, on a whim. Sun warming my skin, heart overflowing with a waterfall of gratitude, I felt so small. Yet, so cared for. So unique in my existence, showered with love.
This song came on. I opened all of the doors in my car, turned up the volume and shed tears alone in the middle of that California desert. Alone in my life. The feelings flying around inside of me were feelings I hope everyone recognizes they have inside of them. Humble. Grateful. Overwhelmed with love for self. Pride. Faith. And, the warm feeling that all is always okay. Even if it doesn’t appear as obviously as we’d hope – it’s truly always okay. We have ourselves. We have those moments. We have the choice to create our own solo song that brings us to tears. We are the music inside of us and we reflect the music we choose to hear.
As Bon Iver says, “Your love will be safe with me” as long as we allow ourselves the right to feel the fears and the pains and then to have the strength to walk us back to whatever place we choose to go.
One thing I’ve learned in my life is that there are those who seek the light, and there are those who understand the light exists inside of us. It is our duty to see it and keep it burning.